Day 16…Mark 3:20-35

"When Jesus returned to the house where he was staying, the crowds began to gather again, and soon he and his disciples couldn’t even find time to eat.” (Mark 3:20)…. “[Jesus said] Anyone who does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.” (Mark 3:35) 

Notes from the devotional:

• Making lists of priorities is commendable, but life does not fit so conveniently into compartments. A neatly balanced life is not easy to achieve.
• Perhaps the desire itself is misplaced. How “balanced” was the life of Jesus and his disciples? We are told that the crowds demanding their attention were so vast and the needs so great that “he and his disciples couldn’t even find time to eat.” (Mark 3:20)
• Jesus and his disciples knew the pressure of life – the pressure of being aware of the needs of a crying world and being prepared to address them. This kind of pressure pushes people away from the equilibrium of a neatly balanced life. You miss meals (and family time, and bedtime, and playtime, and study time, etc etc ad nauseum)
• Jesus’ own family didn’t agree or approve of his lack of balance! (Mark 3:21) - “When his family heard about this, they went to take charge of him, for they said, ‘He is out of his mind.’”
• Not only were Jesus and his disciples driven by their world’s need, they also recognized they were in a spiritual battle for the souls of and and women. Fighting Godly battles required more than balance – it took everything they had.

My notes:

• I NEEDED THIS TODAY.
• I have been struggling with increasing anger and resentment toward my job… toward my office… toward the people I serve. I have been feeling used and abused. I have been watching my kids suffer because people say they can’t afford to pay me when I see those same people turn around and buy EXPENSIVE frivolous things for the very kids of theirs I am trying to help. I am becoming resentful of the way this is dragging my Kelly down and affecting our marriage and our relationship with our kids.
• Then God, you have to go and remind me that if I am in your will as we have felt we were, then that is all that matters. I have to trust that the commitments we are making and the sacrifices we are making are what you want of us. But it is so painful to struggle so, so painful to watch my kids feel like none of this is fair, so painful to try and explain (AND UNDERSTAND MYSELF), why being in God’s will is SUCH A STRUGGLE sometimes. I struggle to stay mindful of the fact that doing your will does not always mean my life WILL be in balance, or even my own life at all. It is yours and I struggle with Kelly and I not getting to share in the family that you have gifted us with.
• Are you telling me not to be resentful of feeling pulled away from you and my family BECAUSE I am doing your work? I understand the point. But it doesn’t make it any easier to accept…
• I am tired. I am tired of wanting more. I am tired of giving every stinking thing, every stinking minute and ounce to this office and to people who don’t seem to care about their own lives and use me to their own ends. I am tired of Kelly having to sacrifice everything for this place, including hr role as mother and wife, to help keep it running.
• I desperately want relief! For me, for my wife and kids, for our bank account, for our time as a family, for our time with You!
• Lord, help me understand the living a life for you isn’t always about balance. It’s about service and commitment and obedience. I am struggling with this and ask that you lift this burden from us in the way that keeps us in your will. Forgive me my anger and resentment today.

Personal challenge:

• Seek ways to find Godly balance in your life.
• How does a life of Godly balance differ from a life of Worldly balance?

~~from The One Year Book of Devotions for Men (Stuart Briscoe, 2000)~~